Sunday, April 10, 2016

Almost done with nursing

Kind of funny.  Kind of made me almost cry. I've been nursing for almost 9 1/2 straight years.  I would take a few weeks off every few years before the birth of my next baby.  That's really all though.  Sleepless nights of nursing babies for years and years.  I'd dream of a few nights in a row without a baby on the boob.  Then, came my surprise tonight.  

So, I'm drying up.  It hurts to nurse due to hormones, not much milk, and Z's teeth.  Tonight I tried nursing and it lasted 30 seconds.  Popped him off and his meltdown ensued.  

After he calmed, he snuggled and asked for boobies.  I told him Mommy's boobies hurt.  His tummy hurt today, and I reminded him, then told him Mommy's boobies hurt.  He seemed to understand.  Then, he glared at me and I said nicely, "it's not my fault".  

His eyes.  Lol!  They rolled sooo far back that I was waiting to see the backs of his eyeballs.  He just laid in my arms.  Eyes rolled up.  He then drank some milk from his cup, snuggled, and he would get sleepy.  Then we would smile at each other.  We did that several times until he fell asleep.  Then I got sad.  I felt like crying.  What if this was the end?  No more boobies for Z.  

Every morning we play a game.  I say "I.  Love..." then he finishes it with mom, dad, or this morning the first answer was "BOOBIES".  Lol!  He does love his boobies.  I will be happy and sad to stop nursing Mr Z.  I'll miss that time together.  It's 15 days away from his 2nd birthday.  He's my longest nursing little one.  I'm done.  Maybe not 100% emotionally, but I'm ready.  It's just a matter of him being ready.